Woman worried that her husband is lying about his finances: 'I find myself wondering why you are even married'

A wife thinks her husband is lying about his finances, and she’s becoming increasingly anxious because he refuses to pay his share of the bills.

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The wife shared her story on Reddit’s “Relationship Advice” forum and asked Redditors for their input and a bit of sympathy. She explained that she thinks her husband is in financial trouble and afraid to confide in her.

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The woman began by explaining that she and her husband split all of their bills. Normally, her husband deposits his share of the bill money into her bank account, and she handles the actual payments. However, for the last few months, he has been increasingly late with paying his share.

“Started for a day or 2 which was ok as I staggered some of the more important bills,” she recalled. “He is self-employed full time, whereas I have a good full-time job.”

However, this month, her husband is 17 days late paying his share, with no sign of plans to pay any time soon.

“Every time I try to talk to him he says he will sort it but won’t offer any action plan or payment schedule,” the wife continued.

To make matters worse, the wife recently arrived home to see a letter from a credit card company addressed to her husband. The wife put her toddler to bed and then confronted her husband.

“When I came back downstairs, the letter was gone,” she recalled. “I asked him outright about the letter and he denied there being one.”

Not only does the wife think that her husband is lying to her about his finances, but she is now having trouble affording essentials for herself.

“[I] have cut down to 1 main meal a day to reduce costs,” she wrote. “My hair is starting to fall out and I am anxious 24/7.”

Every time the wife attempts to talk to her husband, he becomes upset.

“If I raise concerns he deflects and gets angry at me, shouting and throwing nearby objects,” she continued.

Trust issues

At her wits’ end, the wife has turned to Reddit to ask for help.

Some Redditors advised the wife to try to have a calm, empathetic conversation with her husband. Others, however, warned the woman not to trust him.

“Sit him down and explain that, in order for your marriage to succeed, he needs to be transparent with you,” one Redditor advised.

“My advice is this: don’t accuse, don’t berate… approach it from a place of love and empathy and a true want to sit down and discuss it,” another Redditor commented.

“This arrangement is wildly imbalanced and I find myself wondering why you are even married. Then his behavior comes into play and I immediately just think, ‘lawyer up,’” advised another Redditor.

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