This is the UK’s best dad joke

 (Getty Images/iStockphoto)
(Getty Images/iStockphoto)

The world’s best dad joke has been revealed after more than 2,700 gags were submitted in Aldi’s annual competition.

In celebration of Father’s Day, the supermarket invited people to submit their funniest dad jokes, with standup comedian Mark Watson enlisted to judge the best entry.

After reviewing all of the submissions, Watson chose an entry submitted by a father-of-two named Austin May from Bedworth, Warwickshire, as the winner.

Mr May’s joke went as follows: “I once hired a limo but when it arrived, the guy driving it walked off!

“I said ‘Excuse me? Are you not going to drive me?’

“The guy told me that the price didn’t include a driver…… so I’d spent £400 on a limo and have nothing to chauffeur it!”

Defining what makes a good dad joke, Watson explained: “The perfect dad joke has got to be equal parts cringe and cheese - it’s got to make your kids embarrassed to be in the same room as you but still make them laugh. It’s a fine balance!”

He went on to explain his criteria for judging the competition:

“When judging this competition, I was keeping an eye out for those jokes that were so bad, they were actually good,” he said.

“You don’t have to be a dad to tell a dad joke, but I think telling some truly awful ones really is a rite of passage when becoming a dad.”

Watson’s other favourite entries in the competition were:

  • Why did the man fall down the well? Because he didn’t see that well!

  • What did the pirate say on his eightieth birthday? ‘Aye Matey!’

  • Someone has glued my pack of cards together - I don’t know how to deal with it

  • What do you call a zombie who cooks stir fries? Dead man wok-ing”

  • I was wondering why the frisbee kept looking bigger and bigger, and then it hit me

  • I was stood behind a customer at an ATM and he turned around and said “could you check my balance?” – so I pushed him. His balance wasn’t that great

  • Why did the scarecrow get an award? Because he was out standing in his field!

  • What did the daddy buffalo say to his son when he left for work? Bison

  • Two guys walked into a bar. The third guy ducked

  • What do you call a blind dinosaur? A Doyouthinkhesaurus!

You can read more of the best dad jokes here.

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