The Washington Redskins are trash.
Not recyclable trash. Not combustible trash that could be burnt for fuel. Not the kind of trash that a college student could look at and think, hey, that sandwich has only been in there a few minutes, it’s probably still edible, just to use a hypothetical example.
No, the Redskins are sopping, raw-chicken-infested, stinking-to-high-heaven-in-the-heat-of-summer trash.
The latest example: a 34-17 loss to the New York Jets, football’s version of the “Star Wars” prequels. A loss so bad that by the fourth quarter, the home fans were chanting for team owner Daniel Snyder to “Sell the team! Sell the team!”
Attendance was horrendous, as you can see by this photo taken during Daniel Brown’s touchdown celebration ... which came 3:10 into the game:
Maybe all the fans were stuck in traffic heading to Landover. Yeah, right.
Don’t let the score fool you. Washington was down 34-3, in the midst of a touchdown-less streak that lasted 16 quarters. How long is that, aside from “four games”? So long that the Washington Nationals rewrote their entire history in between Redskins touchdowns:
Look, it gives me no pleasure to report that the Redskins are a stinking pile of refuse. I’m sure they’re all good guys who are trying their best. Dwayne Haskins deserves a chance to play quarterback in this league, and Derrius Guice has gone through a hell of a lot in his young career. Plus, my dad is a long-suffering Redskins fan, I have college and work friends who love the ‘Skins, and a family member just moved from Atlanta to Washington, which is really a cruel football downgrade. Still: it is my sad duty to report that, yes, the Washington Redskins are trash.
With the Packers, Eagles and Cowboys still on the schedule, this isn’t getting any better for Washington anytime soon.
The only good news: They don’t have any more national games on the slate, so the stench stays contained to Washington.
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