They play music. They get paid. But you should see the ‘bandwiches’ they get offered to eat

The online world can be a scary place. For me, one of the internet’s most dismaying corners is a members-only forum on Facebook called Bandwiches. It’s a portmanteau word, the crashing together of “band” and “sandwiches”, coined by the saxophonist Stan Harrison after a particularly dismal experience. It celebrates or, to be more exact, bemoans the grim quality of so much of the food offered to musicians on gigs in UK hospitality settings. Here are numerous shots of terrible, cold mini sausage rolls the colour of yesterday’s porridge. There’s a meagre plate of biscuits alongside some orange juice with a handwritten note saying: “Out of date. Help yourself at your own peril.” There are polystyrene boxes filled with a tiny number of indeterminate deep-fried things. And, of course, lots and lots of terrible, floppy sandwiches made with the pappiest of pappy white bread. It’s all so damn beige. And the portions! So small!

This could be dismissed as the nichest of niche problems. Then again, the Bandwiches Facebook group has 4,300 members. That’s a significant slab of the UK’s gigging musicians. And even if it is a side issue, it’s my side issue. I am both a jazz musician and a journalist who writes about food. If I don’t complain about this, who the hell will? People in the hospitality industry do their jobs around meal times. For many years the meals offered both to waiters and kitchen staff was a major issue. Too many restaurants simply didn’t seem to care. Happily, that is generally no longer the case (although there are still exceptions). Musicians, the ones who work in bars and restaurants, hotels and events such as weddings, are too often the forgotten hospitality workers.

There are good stories. Let’s hear it for the Pig Hotel and the magnificent spread they laid on recently for the Jools Holland Big Band. I know from experience that dedicated London music venues such as Brasserie Zedel, Boisdale and Ronnie Scott’s look after their performers. But there are so many other truly lousy stories. The worst offenders are often at the very top end. A pianist pal recently played a four-hour solo piano wedding gig at one of the most garlanded and expensive hotel restaurants in the country. (I wish I could name and shame, but lawyers get twitchy.) His lunch: a single, clingfilm-wrapped sandwich.

Another musician posted an image of an empty table at a significant London restaurant world event. They’d offered him precisely nothing. Then there are the horror stories from weddings, especially if you have the audacity to be, say, a non-meat eater. At best it can be a case of: you can have a go at the buffet but only once everyone else has finished at 11pm. As one musician put it: “We cost less than the flowers, but we’re the thing your guests will remember. Show us a little respect.”

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We’ve all heard of the gig economy, with the implied issues of chronic job insecurity. Musicians know all about the gig economy, because that’s what being a musician is. It means that complaining about shoddy treatment is tough because they need the work. Hence, I’m complaining for them. Please god, let’s abandon bandwiches. Away with the beige. Offer a hot meal. In short, if you are booking musicians for an event don’t forget to feed the piper. And the guitarist. And the pianist and the rest. They are there to bring your guests significant pleasure; don’t make their lives a misery. After all, it’s called the hospitality business. That means being hospitable to everyone.