Singer Misha B has revealed she was left suicidal and needing therapy for post-traumatic stress disorder after appearing as a contestant in the 2011 series of The X Factor.
The star has claimed “scripted” interactions with judges Louis Walsh and Tulisa purposefully painted her as difficult and a bully.
According to the 28-year-old, a rival singer spread gossip to other contestants claiming she was a bully, leading to Walsh commenting on the allegations publicly and saying Misha was “over-confident” in her performances.
The claims led to her being dubbed Misha Bully by the press during her time on the show.
Addressing the issue on Instagram, Misha spoke of an alleged feud with eventual winners Little Mix.
She said: “One of the girls, I think it might have been Jesy [Nelson], said, ‘You’ve been saying Leigh-Anne [Pinnock] has ‘evil eyes’ and you don’t think we’re gonna win and that you think we’re s*** singers’.
“And I was like, wow, first of all, let’s get this clear, I have no energy to be focusing on anybody else when I have so much at stake here. It is not in my character to want to tear another sister down.”
Misha went on to say only judges Kelly Rowland and Gary Barlow appeared to offer her any support.
She went on: “Let me get just this very clear. These judges spent a maximum of one percent time with me and their contestants, apart from Gary and Kelly.
“So my understanding is you’ve created this whole narrative of me being overconfident because I’m black. And in your eyes, black girls should not be confident.”
She then accused Tulisa of addressing her with “scripted” comments in her televised critique after a performance.
She continued: “Moving on to Tulisa – if you go back and watch the clip carefully, and I’ve gone back and watched the clip carefully, this woman had every line scripted before she even opened up her mouth.
“I wasn’t fooled. I’m not fooled. I know what it is here. I know exactly what it is here. And, you see, back in 2011 they got away with it. They got away with so much s***.
The controversy left her feeling suicidal. She explained: “I remember thinking of ways to end my own life.
“You don’t even know. I remember thinking of ways I could just end the pain. We arrived back at the mansion and all I could think about was running away, just getting out of there.
“What I didn’t understand was that that experience, that trauma, had changed me as a person,” she said. “It changed me. I didn’t trust anyone. Everyone asks me, ‘Misha, where have you been? What’s been going on?’ I’ve been battling. I’ve been healing.”
Accusations of scripted interactions regarding Misha are not new.
Speaking in his autobiography, former judge Barlow said: “About half an hour before the show goes live, the producers would come in and they’d go, ‘Oh my God. That Misha. She’s a bully. Can’t believe it. She is such a bully. In fact, you know what? You should say it. You should say it on air. She’s bullied everyone all week’.”
Representatives for Tulisa and Walsh have been contacted for comment.
For confidential emotional support at times of distress, contact The Samaritans at any time by calling 116 123 or emailing firstname.lastname@example.org.