UFC veteran Jason “Mayhem” Miller says he is sorry for all the trouble he’s caused.
Miller, 42, has a years-long history of run-ins with the law. He most recently was arrested Aug. 30 on a misdemeanor charge, one day after the Los Angeles County Sheriff’s Department said he put a man in a chokehold at a West Hollywood nightclub.
The incident occurred just a few months after Miller was released from a one-year prison sentence this past May, which stemmed from 2021 charges that included felony domestic violence, vandalism, attempted grand theft, and resisting arrest.
On Wednesday night, Miller took to Instagram to write a lengthy apology for his “self-destructive behavior” and opened up about his struggle to transition from a year of incarceration back into society.
“I thought I could smoothly transition from prison to the regular world, but things have been more difficult than I imagined, especially interpersonal relationships and the burden of being free,” Miller wrote. “Maybe some of you can understand and empathize, but I don’t expect you to, or even care what happens to an old prizefighter.”
You can read Miller’s full letter below:
I went away for a couple of years to pay my debt to society, and when I got out, I realized that I have much more paying to do.
Maybe it’s hard for the average person to understand living with a stigma firmly etched into your life, so I can’t fault anyone for recoiling in horror upon meeting me, given the press that I get. I wish I were made of stone and didn’t allow it to affect me, but I have, and failed those that love me.
I thought I could smoothly transition from prison to the regular world, but things have been more difficult than I imagined, especially interpersonal relationships and the burden of being free.
Maybe some of you can understand and empathize, but I don’t expect you to, or even care what happens to an old prizefighter. I chose this path far before I realized what could happen after the glory faded away, and I ask myself sometimes if I knew the reality, would I have picked any differently, and consistently I come to the conclusion, that, no, the younger me at the wheel, I could’ve never picked a different path.
By all accounts I am a great coach, but all my personal problems have piled up, and I’ve fallen short of my own standards, therefore I am taking some time to work on myself. Until recently I viewed asking for help as something for the weak, but a very special person has shown me that the actual opposite is true; asking for help shows strength. Strength of character and strength of mind.
My family has bore the brunt of my frustration and self destructive behavior, so to them I offer a sincere apology and if I have directly affected you in a negative manner, I am sorry.
More than likely, you’ve seen the sunny side of Instagram and figured, “Mayhem is a bit whacky, but doing great.”
I’ve been doing horrible and I realize that now and I’m doing everything I can to change it. Thank you for your support, but I’m not reading comments. I’m going to work on me now for the good of my family.
Sorry I won’t be into Fight Science for sparring tomorrow or New Ground Jujitsu for a while, but I have a bigger bout to win.
Jason “Mayhem” Miller