It was an emotional Very Special Episode of The Masked Singer on Wednesday, and not just because we had to say goodbye to two Group B contestants, the Serpent and the Whatchmacallit. When judge Ken Jeong, a former physician himself, found out that the Serpent was none other than singing surgeon Dr. Elvis Francois — whose gorgeous cover of John Lennon’s “Imagine” went viral back in March, after it was featured on Elton John’s iHeart Living Room Concert for America special — he was in tears.
“I just have to say, your version of ‘Imagine’ got us through the pandemic, man,” said a choked-up Ken. “That living room concert you did on Fox, that was the first time we saw it, and in a concert of stars — it was like, Elton John, Billy Joe [Armstrong], everybody — the best moment of that living room concert was you. And I told my wife, who's also a doctor, ‘You know, that's what a real doctor does, man.’”
Dr. Elvis returned the love, noting that The Masked Singer is providing a similar healing service during the pandemic. “Patients oftentimes turn on the television while they're in their hospital beds, and coming in and watching a patient watching The Masked Singer, putting a smile on their face, it's just an incredible way for us to move forward together,” he said.
While Dr. Elvis is in no way quitting his extremely important day job, his too-brief Masked Singer run (which ended with a final sexy-smooth performance of the Jonas Brothers’ “Cool”) proved he is indeed multi-talented. The judges had actually guessed that the Serpent was Daveed Diggs, Usher, John Legend or Boyz II Men’s Wanye Morris. (I thought it was Leslie Odom Jr.) So, the good doctor recently combined his two passions and released the Music Is Medicine EP, featuring his Mayo Clinic colleague and piano accompanist Dr. Will Robinson, to raise money for the Center of Disaster Philanthropy COVID-19 Response Fund.
“This guy is smarter than any doctor on the planet, and there's just truly no one more talented than him,” Ken declared. “And I'm crying because I'm jealous that you're more talented than me. And I just want you to know, man, you just got us through a very difficult time, and we love you so much.”
It was an emotionally heightened evening for Ken in another way, because for once, he really did “know who exactly this is” and guessed the Whatchamacallit correctly — as NBA star Lonzo Ball. “Ken, you got something right once in your life!” exclaimed host Nick Cannon, as Ken jumped on his desk for joy, Dead Poets Society-style. Like Dr. Elvis, Lonzo showed that he too has some impressive side-hustle skills, because the judges had totally pegged the Whatchamacallit (whose last song was “Lean Back” by Terror Squad) as Swizz Beatz or even Tyler, the Creator.
So, this means that the Group B’s Seahorse and Crocodile will be moving on to the semifinals, along with Group A’s Sun and Popcorn and two TBD contestants from next week’s Group C finals. I’m already fairly certain that the Sun is LeAnn Rimes and the Popcorn is Taylor Dayne, but who are Group B’s surviving mystery celebrity cosplayers? Let’s assess and guess:
The Seahorse, “…Baby One More Time”
After this week’s performance, I could almost believe that this is Britney, b****, performing in disguise in order to escape from her father’s allegedly watchful eye. The Seahorse sounded exactly like Britney! Seriously, was this Derrick Barry from RuPaul’s Drag Race? Eh, probably not, because as Nicole noted, the Seahorse “went to some other stratospheric levels with them vocals.”
The clues: We saw a Christmas wreath, Nashville hot chicken with pickles, two baby dolls, and a “spiritual adviser.” We also learned that the Seahorse was “never in a girl group,” so that rules out anyone from Fifth Harmony, En Vogue, or the Spice Girls — but she was “always solo,” so she’s definitely a professional singer. Past clues, verbal and visual, have included “chicken of the sea,” feathers, dolphins, rodeos, Daisy Duke shorts, “tug of war,” an “emotion ocean,” rainbows, and “fearlessness.”
Judges’ guesses: Kesha, Kellie Pickler, Sia.
My guess: Many of the Seahorse clues point to Jessica Simpson, but they seem way too obvious. That “chicken of the sea” reference is probably another sort of fish: a red herring! Kesha is a solid guess (she has Nashville connections and an album called Rainbow), as is Kellie (she’s been in several Christmas movies, and she’s a “pickler,” get it?). But I’m still calling it maybe and sticking with my original guess of LGBTQ+ ally and Emotion/Tug of War pop star Carly Rae Jepsen. The Seahorse sounds just like Carly (when the Seahorse isn’t sounding just like Britney, that is). Let’s just cut to the feeling and crown Carly the Season 4 champion already!
The Crocodile, “Bleeding Love”
The Crocodile has proven to be one of this season’s most versatile vocalists, more of a chameleon than a crocodile, shifting from the raspy rock of his first-week Bon Jovi performance to his own Britney cover, “Toxic,” in week two. This third time out, he showed even more range with a power ballad, delivering what Robin Thicke called his “best vocal” yet. And Nicole Scherzinger gushed, “I’m bleeding love over that performance!”
The clues: His “ride or die” best friend is famous celebrity interviewer, with whom he’s traveled to “six continents.” The Croc star is also an avid gamer who’ll “go step-by-step to get the high score” and has a “one-track mind.” He was also in a "huge cult classic movie.” Other clues this week included a lottery ticket and a vinyl record; past clues have included mentions of a disapproving father, a showbiz childhood filled with “heartache and instability,” pineapples, Las Vegas, Italy, and pirates.
Judges’ guesses: Jared Leto, Jordan Knight, Justin Guarini.
My guesses: The entire internet seems to think this is Nick Carter, whose Backstreet Boys had a successful Vegas residency and have collaborated with Step by Step boy band New Kids on the Block. And the Crocodile really sounds like Nick, even if he sounds a bit different every time he sings. A quick glance at Nick’s IMDB reveals that he was an uncredited extra in Tim Burton’s Edward Scissorhands, and he’s also a huge video game dork. So I agree with the internet: This larger-than-life lounge lizard is probably the BSB heartthrob.
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