Yahoo Movies ‘Halloween Ends’ Is Such a Disappointing Franchise Finale
Not sure what to watch next? Subscribe to The Daily Beast’s Obsessed See Skip newsletter here and get the latest show and movie recommendations every Tuesday.
There are roughly 47,000—oh, wait, a new Netflix Original just dropped; make that 47,001—TV shows and movies coming out each week. At Obsessed, we consider it our social duty to help you see the best and skip the rest.
We’ve already got a variety of in-depth, exclusive coverage on all of your streaming favorites and new releases, but sometimes what you’re looking for is a simple Do or Don’t. That’s why we created See/Skip, to tell you exactly what our writers think you should See and what you can Skip from the past week’s crowded entertainment landscape.
Skip: Halloween Ends
Halloween Ends is the “final” installment in an unnecessary franchise reboot. In Ends, relentless stunt queen Michael Myers faces off against Laurie Strode one “last” time instead of just joining AARP. He’s like 85! Give it a rest.
Here’s Nick Schager’s take:
“The third Halloween outing helmed by David Gordon Green, all of which—chronologically speaking—directly followed John Carpenter’s seminal 1978 original, Halloween Ends provides the umpteenth showdown between the masked marauder and Jamie Lee Curtis’ perpetually stalked Laurie Strode, who continually tries, and fails, to kill the killer who’s turned her life into one long traumatized nightmare. This time, though, things may turn out differently! (Just kidding.) Green’s purported closer is more of the same scare-free nonsense gussied up with blather about evil, survival, and suffering. So dreary is this latest go-round that the film’s title resonates less as a guarantee than as a cruel taunt, tantalizing audiences with finality despite the fact that everyone naturally assumes another reboot (Halloween Reborn? Halloween: The Next Generation?) is only a few years away.
Curtis broods in the identical manner that she did in 2018’s Halloween and 2021’s Halloween Kills (except here with blonde hair), and just like Michael, her routine is stale to the point of parody; when people accuse Laurie of secretly wanting Michael to find her, it’s difficult to see the error in their logic. Allyson is a bland presence and Corey is the sort of wannabe madman that’s all surface—a situation exacerbated by a repeated back-and-forth in which he’s labeled the “psycho” to Laurie’s “freakshow.” Continuity lapses prove as common as clichés (no surprise that Allyson’s highly sexual coworker is doomed), lending the proceedings an overarching slackness that neuters any flickering potential for tension.”
See: The Watcher
The Watcher is a chilling and perfectly paced thriller, eerily plucked from a real-life story by a surprisingly top-form Ryan Murphy. It also has Jennifer Coolidge asking for a “holiday pour” of wine, so.
Bobby Cannavale in The Watcher.
Here’s Coleman Spilde’s take:
“On paper, The Watcher might seem like a redundant Ryan Murphy production, here today and replaced by another literally next week. And though it can’t always escape its creator's rote trappings, The Watcher employs some major star power and enough chilling suspense to succeed not only as a tight thriller, but one of Murphy’s best in years.
Once The Watcher reaches the boundaries of its inspiration, it runs wild—but still clings to the searing tension at the heart of the real mystery. Thankfully, Murphy tempers his typical overexcitement. He and Brennan have stiffened their grips, resisting the urge to pour every possible thematic ingredient into the series at once, avoiding yet another overcooked and overcrowded melange of mediocrity.
The biggest star of all here may be The Watcher’s letters, which are narrated in the series by an unsettling, distorted voice, and remain the absolute scariest part of the show. They’re the grounding dread that anchors the series even when it stumbles into outlandish territory; a sickening reminder that all of this is inspired by a true story. The Watcher understands that the creepiest thing in the technologically inundated modern era is someone observing your every move, with no digital trace or physical presence at all.”
See: Rosaline
Rosaline is a hyper-witty, original twist on Romeo & Juliet that follows Romeo’s ex. Hell doth hath no fury like ye Capulet cousin scorndth—or whatever Shakespeare said.
Kaitlyn Dever stars in Rosaline.
Here’s Fletcher Peters’ take:
“‘Meet Romeo’s ex,’ posters for the movie tease. Those three words describe the plot better than anyone else could, really, as does the tagline: “The love story you know. The ex you don’t.” Rosaline follows, well, Rosaline (Kaitlyn Dever)—the throwaway character from Shakespeare’s original play, an ex of Romeo (Kyle Allen) who also happens to be a Capulet. When Rosaline’s beautiful, perfect cousin Juliet (Isabela Merced) falls in love with Rosaline’s man, chaos ensues.
Rosaline plays with history, as any lighthearted period piece should. Sure, there’s anachronistic music (a string rendition of “Dancing On My Own” by Robyn is ripped straight from Bridgerton). But Rosaline also teases Romeo for his antiquated speech; characters are canonically queer; and the ending isn’t quite as tragic as memory serves. But Romeo and Juliet’s core sparkle of young love, full of sneaking around at night and bad poetry, remains.”
See: Piggy
Piggy is a brutal, bloody Spanish horror film about the horrors of bullying that manages to feel extremely current, and not like a ramped up episode of Glee. (Thank God!)
Laura Galán in Piggy.
Here’s Laura Bradley’s take:
“At its most intense, Piggy—a horror film from Spanish director Carlota Pereda premiering in select theaters Friday and wide on Oct. 14—is almost as fascinated in bodily destruction as the Saw movies. Pereda’s greatest triumphs, however, are the film’s brutal bullying scenes.
Pereda maintains a frenetic pace throughout the film and avoids the didactic pitfalls that can drag down even the best-conceived social horror films. Confident, impressionistic, and stressful to the last moment, Piggy is a gripping testament to just how brutal human beings can be—especially to those they’ve deemed less than human.”
Sign up for our See Skip newsletter here to find out which new shows and movies are worth watching, and which aren’t.
Get the Daily Beast's biggest scoops and scandals delivered right to your inbox. Sign up now.
Stay informed and gain unlimited access to the Daily Beast's unmatched reporting. Subscribe now.
