Demi Lovato says she has 'survivor's guilt' over Mac Miller's overdose: 'That could have been you'

Justine Browning
·2 min read

Demi Lovato has admitted to having "survivor's guilt" after rapper Mac Miller's fatal overdose.

Miller died in September of 2018 at the age of 26, just months after Lovato was hospitalized for her own battles with addiction, which almost led to her facing a similar fate.

The singer revealed how Miller's tragic passing affected her in an interview on The Zane Lowe Show podcast on Thursday, saying that after hearing the news, she realized it could have been her.

Demi Lovato attends the OBB Premiere Event for YouTube Originals Docuseries "Demi Lovato: Dancing With The Devil"; Mac MIller visits at SiriusXM Studio
Demi Lovato attends the OBB Premiere Event for YouTube Originals Docuseries "Demi Lovato: Dancing With The Devil"; Mac MIller visits at SiriusXM Studio

Rich Fury/Getty Images; Robin Marchant/Getty Images Demi Lovato; Mac MIller

"I had a lot of survivor's guilt after my overdose, because right after that Mac Miller died, and it just put everything into perspective for me of, 'That could have been you, that almost was you, and how are you going to live your life now?'" she said. "And it affected me a lot."

Grappling with what happened to Miller and other friends with similar struggles has also impacted the 29-year-old pop star's approach to music. Her song "Dead Friends," which appears on her new album, Holy Fvck, serves as a tribute to them.

"I've lost friends that were around my age, and those hurt so deeply because we've been in the trenches together," she said.

Lovato's overdose occured after she was given drugs laced with fentanyl, something that also happened to Miller.

Lovato recounted her near-death experience in the documentary series Dancing With the Devil last year, telling EW ahead of the project's release, "Realizing the high I wanted would kill me was what I needed to get me clean for good."

In May, one of the three men who provided Miller with oxycodone pills laced with fentanyl was sentenced to 17 years in prison.

Miller was at the height of his career when he died. His singles "Loud," "Donald Trump," and his Ariana Grande collaboration "The Way" all topped the charts. His final LP, Swimming, was released a month before his death, while his posthumous album, Circles, came out in 2020.

Meanwhile, Lovato is celebrating the release of Holy Fvck, taking to Instagram to express what the album has meant to her. "HOLY FVUK gave me the freedom to express myself in ways I didn't know were possible and find joy I'd been missing when making music," she wrote.

Holy Fvck is out today. Watch Lovato's interview on The Zane Lowe Show above.

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