Alyssa Scott Pens Heartfelt Tribute to Her and Nick Cannon's Late Son Zen: 'Love You for Eternity'

·4 min read

Alyssa Scott is mourning the death of her and Nick Cannon's 5-month-old son, Zen, who died of a brain tumor.

On Wednesday, Scott shared an emotional tribute on Instagram to Zen and the times she shared with him before his death on Sunday. The post — a video montage — is paired with Jhené Aiko's song "Promises," and a heartfelt message from Scott was written in the caption.

"Oh my sweet Zen. The soreness I felt in my arm from holding you is slowly fading away. It's a painful reminder that you are no longer here," she wrote. "I caught myself looking in the backseat as I was driving only to see the mirror no longer reflecting your perfect face back at me. When I close a door too loudly I hold my breath and wince knowing a soft cry will shortly follow. It doesn't come. The silence is deafening."

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"These last 5 months we have been in this race together. We would hand the baton off to each other. You kept me going. It would be the middle of the night and you would smile at me. A surge of energy would fill my body and pure joy would radiate from within me," Scott continued. "We were a team, both determined to see it through. It feels unbearable running without you now. I can't."

The video showed Zen over the past few months, including shots of him playing with a toy piano, taking a bath, and even moments from the hospital. Scott also shared a photo of her rocking Zen in her arms as he looked up at her.

Nick Cannon Son’s Mother Alyssa Posted a Heartbreaking Tribute
Nick Cannon Son’s Mother Alyssa Posted a Heartbreaking Tribute

Alyssa Scott Instagram Alyssa Scott

The model then added that she can "feel" herself "being carried" by her 3-year-old daughter and the support of others, who are "encouraging me to not give up" since Zen's death.

"It has been an honor and privilege being your mommy," Scott ended her tribute. "I will love you for eternity. 6*23*21 - 12*5*21."

RELATED: Nick Cannon Calls Alyssa Scott 'Strongest Woman I've Ever Seen' After News of Their Son's Death

Nick Cannon Son’s Mother Alyssa Posted a Heartbreaking Tribute
Nick Cannon Son’s Mother Alyssa Posted a Heartbreaking Tribute

Alyssa Scott Instagram Zen

Cannon, 41, announced his son's death on his eponymous talk show, telling listeners Tuesday, "Today is a special one y'all for many reasons but it's not gonna be an easy one. I haven't even shared this with anybody, not even the crew. I had a very tough weekend."

He said that Zen, his youngest and seventh child, was taken to the doctor at two months old because of his enlarged head. Doctors found fluid in the baby's head and discovered a malignant tumor requiring brain surgery, Cannon said.

"He had this real interesting breathing and by the time he was two months old I noticed…he had this nice sized head, I called it a Cannon head. We didn't think anything of it, he had a normal Cannon head. But I wanted to take him to the doctor to get the breathing and the sinus thing checked out," Cannon said. "We thought it would be a routine process."

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Nick Cannon Son’s Mother Alyssa Posted a Heartbreaking Tribute
Nick Cannon Son’s Mother Alyssa Posted a Heartbreaking Tribute

Alyssa Scott Instagram

Zen later had surgery and was given a shunt to drain the fluid, which made Cannon and Scott feel "faithful and hopeful" at the time, but the infant would later encounter additional difficulties around Thanksgiving.

Cannon said he saw his son for the last time over weekend.

"I didn't know how I was gonna handle today but I just really wanted to grieve with my family, people who love you. I didn't want to make it about any pageantry so I kind of went back and forth of what I should do but I was always taught, you go through it you grow through it, you keep pushing," he said. "I'm here to show that I can fight through this, I'm feeling it, I'm vulnerable, I'm open. this is a special show dedicated to my beautiful son Zen."

RELATED: Nick Cannon Thanks Fans for Support After Death of Baby Son: 'It's Been an Outpouring of Love'

nick cannon, alyssa scott
nick cannon, alyssa scott

Courtesy nick cannon

He also praised Scott for her strength while dealing with their son's health troubles, telling his listeners: "Zen's mom, Alyssa, was just the strongest woman I've ever seen."

He added, "Never had an argument, never was angry. Was emotional when she needed to be but always the best mom, and continues to be the best mom..."

Cannon is also dad to 5-month-old twins Zion Mixolydian and Zillion Heir, whom he shares with Abby De La Rosa; 11-month-old daughter Powerful Queen and son Golden, 4, whom he shares with Brittany Bell; and twins Moroccan and Monroe, 10, whom he shares with ex-wife Mariah Carey.

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